I learn that God hasn't been really kind to each and everyone of us. Somehow, He found it funny to put bitches into our lives to make it...erm...a little "more happening". Thats not where the joke ends. He makes the biggest bitch in your life your mother.
And again, the misunderstandings between me and my mum widens. I feel the gap is so wide between the 2 of us. And since the misunderstanding is so wide, well, might as well just leave it. And hope that maybe one day, either one of us will have an epiphany and suddenly understand each other.
The problem arises again with this issue of "Money". I don't want to ever in my life, talk to my mother about money again. Its so frustrating to talk to her. And boy, she really can link up all the shit together.
From money to me being selfish (huh?) to me supporting the family (yea...I'm sure $500 can feed the whole Singapore) to giving her "allowance" (Did I mention $500 can feed Singapore, I'm able to donate to the UNICEF to feed the kids in Africa too!!!) to how I don't care about her (Yea...my mum is just some random woman who decides to live in my house) and before it goes on, I went into my room and shut the door on her.
I'm almost done taking her crap. I have thoughts of moving out. I'm so frustrated with her.
She keeps expecting a lot from me, I try my best not to disappoint her, but at the same time I almost gave my life trying to explain to her why I can't live up to her expectation now. My mum never quite grasp the concept of me being in NS right now. She just thinks that I'm going to work as usual.
Yea, she got that part right...except I'm paid even less than a student working part time in McDees. Talk about workers wage in Singapore, and yet, its the Gahmen who underpays their manpower.
She expects me to pay for everything myself, which as a matter of fact, I'm doing so for most of my stuff. The only thing that she is paying for me right now is my phone bill, which I will take over as soon as I get out from this binding vocation, just so I can shut her up.
I know one year from now, I'm going to have the same conversation on the same topic with her again. Its when I get a full time job and she asks me about my salary (which I'm going to lie to her about) and wants me to make necessary arrangements for her this and that. Which to that, I'm going to tell her what I've already planned for her, just so I can shut her up and not hear her talk about this money issue again. Because its so frustrating to talk sense into her.
I'm just going to end my blog here, its pissing me off enough just to even think about what she blabbled just now.
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